doing the right thing...or not

Yesterday I had the privilege of attending the Ethics in Business and Community Awards, sponsored by Recognize Good and benefiting the Samaritan Center here in Austin.  A lot of the background work takes place by Concordia University students and participants in Leadership Austin.  The event is always well attended and is a celebration of those individuals and organizations that not only say they do the right thing...they actually do the right thing.  It was good to be in a room full of people who believe that doing good is good business.

So this early Friday morning has me thinking about why it might be that those in leadership roles, who believe they are doing the right thing, might actually not be doing the right thing.  I'm not thinking about the Enrons or Lehman Brothers of the world..I am thinking about those organizations which are doing their day to day work, making day to day decisions, and doing things in a manner that most of us would consider ethical.  But is it always that easy?  I would posit that many of us in leadership roles believe we are doing the right thing and, that in fact, we may not be doing the right thing.  Why might that be?  Here are a few thoughts:

• leaders are often isolated: it is easy to be isolated and make decisions in that isolation, whether it be others not telling leaders what they need to know or leaders not creating the culture where others can tell them what they need to know.
• leaders put the organization first: yes, it is all about people...and at the end of the day the organization needs to (and most often should) survive into the future.  Deciding between the future of the organization and the future of some people in the organization is fraught with the possibility of not doing (or maybe doing) the right thing
• leaders love the phrase "for the common good": of course those in leadership roles should act for the common good and, in most cases, that would be the ethical thing to do...and it could lead to behavior that harms and impacts others.
• leaders work hard to protect the illusion of being the leader...most people expect the leader to know everything about everything (and many leaders believe the same about themselves).  Protecting this image can lead to decision making that might cause great harm to others.
• leaders feel the need to be right: this is closely related to the above concept, where the reason people are moved into leadership roles is because they have been very good at decision making in the past and, for the most part, were always right in those decisions.  Having to always be right can lead to very bad decision making.
• leaders have learned how to spin a good story: it is important for those in leadership roles to put the organization's best foot forward, hoping that everyone will see the possibilities that exist for future growth.  People believe that if they do the right thing, good things will happen more often than not...and if they don't, leaders might then turn around and not do the right thing to get the story they want (and might need).

Perhaps this is not as much an issue of right and wrong as it is an issue of leaders having the inner fortitude to wrestle with their decision making...and their angels and demons.  Leadership is about making decisions which have an impact on people, organizations, and on the common good.  Many of those decisions are not the easy ones (that's why they end up in the leader's office). And perhaps this is also an issue of facing the consequences of one's decisions...and doing so in a manner that upholds the dignity of those involved, as well as the dignity of the leader (and the dignity of the organization).  Not an easy topic to consider for leaders...especially on an early Friday morning.

live from new york

I am sitting in the aroma espresso bar at the corner of Church and Barclay, and from the window I can see the towering spire atop One World Trade Center...I am watching hundreds of people from across the globe walking in front of me...buses, bicycles, and cars are zooming up and down the street...and I am sipping on an americano waiting for a Concordia University Texas alumnus to join me in about an hour.  I LOVE NEW YORK CITY!

And as I sit here thinking about leadership, the idea of confident humility keeps crossing my mind.  As I walked up to the One World Trade Center building earlier this morning, I was reminded of how tall those two buildings were early in the morning of September 11, 2001...and how they were reduced to nothing just a few hours later.  I was reminded of how confident people were that morning, walking the very streets I was now on...and how their lives were turned upside down just a few hours later.  I was reminded of how life changed for all of us on that day, changing the way we thought about travel, safety, and war...and how, almost 16 years later, people continue to live their lives in a manner that moves them forward toward their goals.

So what about confident humility helps to define leadership?  Here are a few thoughts for this Friday morning from New York:

• leaders will get to that place where everything seems to be aligned and life is grand...and it can be at that very moment that things change.  Never get too comfortable and be prepared for whatever might be coming next.
• sometimes everything seems to be falling apart and the organization looks like it is moving one step forward and three steps backward...and tomorrow will be another day.  There is always a chance to regroup and start again, and sometimes the very struggle leaders face is the genesis of the greatness that might be coming next.
• people will often enter into a conversation believing they are right and have the answers needed to solve the problem...and it is at this point one should step back, understand they do not know everything, and re-enter into the conversation with a sense of humility.  They may be right AND they could be wrong.  
• leaders are often told (and often believe) that they should have all the answers.  It is at that moment when leaders need to look around and ask for help...and not only from others in leadership roles.  It might be the very person sitting next to you that can provide the solution you are looking for.
• walking (and leading) alone can be very lonely...and it is easy to lose one's sense of direction without someone to help guide the way.  Submitting to the authority of another person (or at least their general thoughts and ideas) allows one to lead more confidently, knowing they are part of a team that makes life happen.

So many people...so many stories...so much energy. That's the essence of New York (and leadership). There's nothing better than to be there and enjoy the place!

are you a truth teller?

Numerous people have often told me that I can count on them to tell me the truth.  Most of the time when I hear that phrase, it comes as a result of someone telling me what they believe is the truth and, of course, they are most often telling me what I or someone else have done wrong.  I believe that when someone reminds me that I can count on them to tell me the truth, they are wearing their truth-telling as a badge of honor and believe that I will consistently seek them out to tell me the truth about myself or others.  When I hear the phrase “you can rely on me to tell you the truth,” other phrases that run through my head include “I’m only telling you this for your own good” and “it hurts me to tell you this, but…”

Telling the truth is a good thing – it is a value society holds up as something that is worthy of good people and good citizens.  Communities run smoothly when people tell the truth…relationships are deepened when people tell the truth…fraud is exposed when people tell the truth…all organizations need someone to say “the emperor has no clothes.”   So what can be wrong with being a truth teller?

I assume most people would say that telling the truth is a virtue one should practice…and yet Aristotle never names truth-telling as one of the virtues in his Ethics.  Aristotle talks about many things, most of which have to do with living in a middle ground and understanding the consequences when one practices a virtue on its edges (i.e. courage is somewhere in between cowardice and foolhardiness).  In my experience, most truth tellers do not live in a middle ground…they are right and the other person is wrong.  The idea or concept that the truth teller might be wrong never seems to enter that person’s mind - and that is where the truth teller errs.

To be a truth teller – and to be heard as a truth teller – people must enter into that time and place with a humble confidence (I might be wrong AND it is important for me to say this).  Telling the truth is never wrong in and of itself…it can be wrong when it is approached in a manner that exhibits either bravado or foolhardiness.  Truth is best told when it is asked for and, when one does not ask, the truth teller can begin by asking permission of the other person if they may speak truth to them.  It may also be that truth tellers should practice the art of discernment – is this the right time to tell the truth or would waiting until another time be better?  That, as St. Paul reminds the people of Ephesus, is “telling the truth in love.”

when a leader has nothing to say

 I have gone five weeks without posting a blog, something that has not happened in a long time.  I could blame it on being too busy, but that would seem to suggest that I was not busy when I was consistently writing this blog; I could blame it on being lazy, but that would seem to suggest that my character and demeanor has changed over time; I could blame it on too much travel, but I traveled as much (if not more) during the month of January and consistently produced a Friday Morning Blog during that stretch; or I could blame it on having nothing of importance to say...and that is what I would like to think about this morning.

There are times (I believe) where leaders have nothing to say...and perhaps during those times leaders should say nothing at all.  The need to constantly say something (even when nothing should be said) is a disease (dis-ease?) from which many (if not most) leaders suffer.  It is a curse of the job, and one that is often put on leaders by those who follow.  Those who teach or speak in public know the feeling...everyone is sitting there waiting for you to say something; and not just to say something, but something that will inspire and energize.  Leaders are expected to have all the right words to say, even when nothing needs to be (or should be) said.

Don't get me wrong...there have been plenty of things I have been thinking about over the past month that have to do with leadership, many of which have been said to friends, colleagues, and others I happen to meet from time to time.  It just has not felt like the right time to put those thoughts into a weekly blog, so I have chosen not to do so for the past five weeks.  Does that make me less of a leader?  Does that mean that my ideas are drying up?  Does that mean that I have less time to devote to sharing those ideas?  I do not know...the only thing I do know is that it felt appropriate to be quiet for five weeks...and sometimes that is what those in leadership roles need to do.

Here's a challenge...next time you have a meeting of a group of people (and you are supposed to be in charge) just stand in the front of the room and not say anything.  Let someone else begin the conversation (without you inviting them to do so).  Those first few minutes will seem like an eternity (both for you and for those in the audience).  My guess is that someone will finally ask a question and, instead of you telling them what you are thinking about, you will get to answer the questions they are thinking about.   Sometimes it is okay to just have nothing to say.

where are you standing?

I just returned from three days of watching baseball in Arizona, enjoying spring training and the company of fellow brothers.  One of our discussions was centered on where fielders stand on a given play or for a given batter (or for that matter, where batters stand facing a given pitcher or situation).  This conversation (as well as many others) led me to consider what it might have to do with leadership, thus the title of today's blog.

So what might it mean for leaders to consider where they are standing...and what is the impact that standing might have?  Here are a few thoughts for this Friday morning:

• physically, leaders need to consider where to stand when they address their constituencies - are you directly in the middle, do you stand to one side or the other, or do you consistently move around?
• values-wise, leaders need to be able to know and articulate where they stand.  What is most important to them and does everyone know and understand the implications of what the leader holds as important? And what happens when individuals violate the leader's most dearly held values? (and perhaps even more important, what happens when the leader violates his or her own most dearly held values?)
• strategically, leaders must stand firm when competing ideas or needs want to deter the organization from moving in the agreed upon direction.  Even the very best ideas pushed for by the very best people need to checked against the current strategic direction (and, if a change in direction is warranted, the leader needs to be able to explain why they are choosing not to stand firm at that time)
• personnel-wise, the leader should have the ability to stand in the another person's shoes and work hard to understand their viewpoint, especially when there is conflict or unmet expectations.  Hearing and understanding what the other person is saying or doing can lead to a better outcome for everyone involved
• budgetarily, leaders have to stand firm and not let their organization make decisions which can harm them in the long run. Investing in the organization's core capabilities and choosing not to invest in activities that are not required (and insisting on holding the line in terms of agreed upon margin) are all part of the leader's stance in terms of financial health

Thinking about where you stand can serve to strengthen one's leadership capacity. Where the leader stands will help to define what the leader is standing for...and in turn help others know how to stand as they move the organization forward in its mission and vision.

from responder to listener

The reality is that those who react, respond, and make things happen often get promoted to positions of leadership.  The ability to see a problem and fix it is exactly what people see as valuable in most organizations.  Those of us who are currently in a leadership position most likely got there because we were able to react, respond, and make things happen.  The problem comes that when one moves into that leadership role, it suddenly becomes more important to listen and think rather than act and do.  The other day I asked someone what they had been learning about themselves, and their response was "I am learning to listen to listen, rather than listen to respond."  That is the essence of what it means to lean into one's role as a leader.

Now here's the rub...because the ability to react, respond, and make things happen is most likely built into the DNA of those in leadership roles, the natural reaction will be to respond rather than listen - and that can easily get someone into trouble because of that natural reaction.  So what can be done?  How do those in leadership roles stay in the listening mode and not rush to the responding mode?  Here are a few ideas:

• stop before you offer a solution...rather than offer your own solution, ask the person if they have an idea about a solution
• have a series of 3-4 questions that you always ask...these are your go-to questions that everyone knows you are going to pull out of your back pocket
• pause before entering into dialogue...before the meeting begins, take a deep breath and remind yourself of why you are there and what you should be bringing to the table
• finish each meeting with a ratio inventory...determine what your ratio was of questions asked to statements made, and ask yourself if you are happy with that ratio
• ask for feedback...check with those around you if they believe you are more interested in responding or listening
• stop and ask for forgiveness...if you find yourself in the middle of solving for a problem, stop your rambling and ask the other person for forgiveness - and then let them start solving the problem
• remind yourself that you are not the smartest person in the room...which is often hard to do when everyone else is telling you (directly or indirectly) that you are the smartest person in the room
• enter into all conversations with humility...you don't know what you don't know, and because of that you will never have all of the answers

Unfortunately, this is not something that goes away over time.  Remember that those in leadership positions got there because they are wired to respond, and that immediate need to respond never really goes away.  The paradox is that once one understands that this initial reaction will always be there, the easier it becomes to manage it.  And that's what leaders do - they manage themselves so they can lead in a more effective manner. And remember that it is in the listening that leaders best respond to others - and that is really what most people are asking for from leaders.

when a leader loses their voice

Last week I had no voice...literally.  I had been sick, I overused my voice, and my vocal cords gave out on me.  Just having to squeak out a few words was painful and all I wanted to do was be quiet.  Yet the job demanded that I appear at certain functions to speak, hold meetings with individuals or groups, and walk the campus greeting people.  It finally got to the point where I was unable to speak to a groups and had to ask others to step in for me.  I had no voice.

My belief is that leaders can lose their voice even when they are healthy and their vocal cords are functioning just fine.  I can speak, but if no one really listens I have no voice; I can lead meetings, but if I have no influence I have no voice; I can meet and greet people all day long, but if no one really cares I have no voice.  What can those in leadership roles do to keep from losing their metaphorical voice?  Here are a few thoughts:

• give the voice rest...just as I had to stop talking to get back my physical voice, leaders at times need to stop talking and spend more time both listening and in quiet contemplation.
• talk less, smile more (with apologies to the musical Hamilton)...sometimes presence is as important (or even more important) than one's physical voice being heard.  Letting others know that you are there and being a part of the event is just as important as speaking at the event.
• choose words carefully...more talking does not always equal a stronger voice.  Stay on target, be careful with words, and be succinct.  Many times less really is more.
• keep the voice at a lower level...when trying to make a point, those in leadership roles can often get excited and perhaps even agitated.  The louder and more aggressive the voice, the less people might actually listen.
• stay away from large crowds...smaller meetings take more time, but the ability to craft one's message for an individual can go along way in making one's voice really heard.
• let others speak...leaders often believe that they are the ones who deliver the message best; the truth is that there are many people in the organization who can say things better and more to the point.  Give them the chance to practice their own voice and others the chance to here a new voice.

My greatest fear was realized as I considered what might happen if my physical voice never fully came back.  I realized that my voice was the tool by which I do my work.  That is true for the leader's metaphorical voice as well.  Perhaps the fear of losing that voice should be greater than the fear of losing one's physical voice.

This past week I have talked much less, avoided large crowds, talked only in a softer voice, drank plenty of tea and honey, and regularly used salt and warm water to heal the throat.  I am not yet a 100% but am now able to hold a conversation without much pain.  I have learned my lesson to take better care of my voice...and I have learned to care for my metaphorical voice as well.  Let's hope that lesson serves me well for years to come.